I've been feeling really, really good the past couple of days. I feel like I'm almost back to my old self. Part of that could be that for the first time in a while I haven't been wrapped up in procedures and talking to the doctors so I've been able to put things in the background for now. I still have to schedule my second endoscopy, but I think I haven't called the hospital yet because I'm partly wanting to put it off so I can feel normal-ish a little bit longer.
Eric and I went on a date last night which was wonderful! We were originally supposed to go swing dancing, but it was insanely crowded at the very beginning and we knew it would only get more crowded, so we went and had some gelato instead. :) It was just nice to be out, not talking about my health, but talking about us and the exciting things in our future instead. I love my husband - I can't brag about him enough. He is the most generous, kind-hearted, selfless, compassionate person I know and I am so blessed that he's mine.
Anyway, enough gushing. The biggest reason why I'm feeling good this week is because it's Holy Week. The week my Savior died and was raised again.
Today is Good Friday. My Savior died on this day (not this actual day, but you know what I mean) 2,000 years ago. I can't imagine what it must have been like to be a disciple on that day - looking at their Leader, Teacher, Friend... hanging on the cross. Dying. Calling on God and asking why He's been abandoned. What must they have felt? Shame...Disappointment...Hopeless...Confusion... Despair. They didn't have the certainty of the whole story like we do. They didn't know. They thought everything they had believed in was wrong, which is why Peter denied Jesus, why Thomas refused to acknowledge Christ's resurrection until he could actually see and touch Him.
Christ died. He didn't fall asleep, He didn't just encounter a painful experience. My Savior died. For what? For a measly soul like me? I am nothing. But John 3:16, as "overused" as it may be, is so true.
"For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him may not perish but have everlasting life."I don't know about you, but I certainly don't deserve that kind of love and certainly not that kind of sacrifice. Nothing that I could have ever done could earn me my salvation - I am a despicable human being, unworthy of the gift God has given me.
So today we mourn the death of Jesus. Today we look at the great sacrifice He made as He shed His blood on the cross to save us from our sins and eternal punishment. But this is not the end. We have Sunday to look forward to. However, as much as I want to shout praises now, now is a time for solemnity. Now is a time of remembrance for the ultimate act of Love.
Take my advice - if a church near you is doing a Good Friday service, go to it. Hear the Gospel being preached, and take the time to remember what Christ did for you and for everyone else who believes. So often we go about our lives and forget. We're too "busy." The practice of remembrance and solemnity is lost on us. So tonight, if you believe in Christ as your Savior, take communion. Focus all your energy and attention on what He did for you. Allow it to overwhelm you. Allow yourself to be overcome with emotion because of the great price He paid for you. And when you leave the church, when you move on with your evening and your weekend, don't forget. Keep remembering. Keep the knowledge of what He did for you fresh in your mind.
Never forget that Christ died to save us from our sins, but more importantly... never, ever forget that He's no longer in the grave.