Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Blown About And Tossed Around.

This summer has been... crazy, to say the very least. I have felt so blown about in my life and in my faith that I have a hard time seeing which way is up sometimes. My internship has been the most stressful and most growing experience that I've ever had in my entire life. My emotional, spiritual, and physical life has been tested, bent, wrung out, and broken this whole summer. Though I've thoroughly enjoyed all the time that I've had with my students, it hasn't been easy.

I've found myself asking a lot of questions about my faith. Is the faith that I have real? Am I willing to do anything for the cause of Christ? Am I willing to follow God's leading, no matter where it may send me? Am I in this just to be comfortable, or am I willing to step out of my comfort zone and in faith?

Unfortunately, I have yet to answer most of these questions. I've just felt so blown about that I don't have any stability right now in order to answer those questions. As soon as I get my feet on the ground again, I know that I'll be able to answer those questions with confidence. I see the light at the end of the tunnel though, which is wonderful.

I don't know how and I don't know when, but I know that God is going to bring me through this difficult time that I find myself in. I am longing to feel long-lasting joy again. I'm longing to feel full of life again. I know that hope is there, but when things will actually start happening, I can't be sure.

Please continue to hold me in your prayers.

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